Ironically enough, earlier today, my mother asked me if my boyfriend was "old-fashioned" towards me. When I asked her what she meant by "old-fashioned", she responded with "well, does he respect you?".
Needless to say I didn't answer my mother's question. Not because he doesn't respect me, but because I hope that men have grown to respect women more in more recent times.
I find myself wanting my significant other to open the door for me, buy me flowers, and pay for the bill (well, in that case, no one really wants to pay for the bill haha). Yet, when I think about it, is this a contradiction for the equal rights I have always desired? Is society's meaning of "chivalry" a contradiction to rights?
In Johnson's reading, he discusses a woman who found that the "opening-door ritual" did more for men than for women. She believed it was symbolic of a male-dominance, and showed that the woman couldn't open the door for herself.
When it comes down to it, people do not want to take the blame. They are innocent because they didn't know any better. They are innocent because it is not sexism, it is chivalry. They are innocent because they didn't mean it.
So, if one person murders another person, and doesn't mean it, are they considered innocent?
I teach my son "ladies first" and when he is big enough I will teach him to hold the doors. Not because I want him to think he is in a position of power but rather all signs of respect that I think a good man should show to women and people in general. Likewise all the kids in our family were taught to take care of their grandparents not because we were taught to be agist but we were taught to be respectful. So I sometime wonder how often good intentions or signs of respect are misinterpreted as symbols of dominance or power.
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